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"It's important to have support that's educated as well as therapeutic."2. "I used a criminal attorney and got a poor settlement," admits Christine K. On the other hand, a lawyer who's well-versed in family law could get you a better settlement because she knows the state-law nuances and local judges and lawyers, says Jacqueline Newman, a partner at a boutique New York City law firm specializing in divorce.If you and your husband have complicated combined assets, you may need additional pros."Divorcing just means that the relationship didn't work out," she says.

to do) if you're going through—or just contemplating—a divorce.Here, real women share what they wish they'd known when they split from their husbands and divorce professionals weigh in on how to combat the most unexpected, yet most common, mistakes they've seen clients make.Rest assured, these 10 lessons can get you through the end of your marriage, both financially and emotionally. It may take a long time to recover—and that's okay.Step one: Thoroughly understand your current cost of living the divorce proceedings start. Even with carefully planning out your future expenses, something surprising may pop up."If you don't know what you'll need in the future, you won't be able to ask for it and you surely won't get it," she says. For example, your husband may be able to boot you from his health insurance plan, leaving you with an added cost of as much as

to do) if you're going through—or just contemplating—a divorce.

Here, real women share what they wish they'd known when they split from their husbands and divorce professionals weigh in on how to combat the most unexpected, yet most common, mistakes they've seen clients make.

Rest assured, these 10 lessons can get you through the end of your marriage, both financially and emotionally. It may take a long time to recover—and that's okay.

Step one: Thoroughly understand your current cost of living the divorce proceedings start. Even with carefully planning out your future expenses, something surprising may pop up.

"If you don't know what you'll need in the future, you won't be able to ask for it and you surely won't get it," she says. For example, your husband may be able to boot you from his health insurance plan, leaving you with an added cost of as much as $1,000 per month.

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to do) if you're going through—or just contemplating—a divorce.Here, real women share what they wish they'd known when they split from their husbands and divorce professionals weigh in on how to combat the most unexpected, yet most common, mistakes they've seen clients make.Rest assured, these 10 lessons can get you through the end of your marriage, both financially and emotionally. It may take a long time to recover—and that's okay.Step one: Thoroughly understand your current cost of living the divorce proceedings start. Even with carefully planning out your future expenses, something surprising may pop up."If you don't know what you'll need in the future, you won't be able to ask for it and you surely won't get it," she says. For example, your husband may be able to boot you from his health insurance plan, leaving you with an added cost of as much as $1,000 per month."I wasn't prepared for the loneliness that accompanied Christmas," she says."It amplified the concept of a broken home." She wishes she had made plans to see her mother or a friend—or taken a vacation—to take her mind off spending the holiday by herself.Simplybadmouthing your ex is likely to hurt your kids more than your husband, even if you don't think they hear or read what you say."Anything written online about an ex-spouse will exist forever—when the children are old enough to read," cautions Newman. Being divorced doesn't mean you're a failure, less competent or less desirable."Too many men dodge their financial responsibilities, so waiting for that first alimony check is unwise. Newman says that a client of hers told her husband's boss about his affair with his secretary and ended up getting him fired.Try to have money available—like $5,000—within days. "It not only 'showed him;' it also showed the wife—and their children—what life is like on a lower salary," she says.

,000 per month."I wasn't prepared for the loneliness that accompanied Christmas," she says."It amplified the concept of a broken home." She wishes she had made plans to see her mother or a friend—or taken a vacation—to take her mind off spending the holiday by herself.Simplybadmouthing your ex is likely to hurt your kids more than your husband, even if you don't think they hear or read what you say."Anything written online about an ex-spouse will exist forever—when the children are old enough to read," cautions Newman. Being divorced doesn't mean you're a failure, less competent or less desirable."Too many men dodge their financial responsibilities, so waiting for that first alimony check is unwise. Newman says that a client of hers told her husband's boss about his affair with his secretary and ended up getting him fired.Try to have money available—like ,000—within days. "It not only 'showed him;' it also showed the wife—and their children—what life is like on a lower salary," she says.

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