Check out my CD series if you really want to get the best results out of your online dating experience. Also, if her profile is lame and generic, expect her responses to your emails to be the same.Don’t be surprised when a chick whose entire profile consists solely of the phrase, “I love shopping, traveling and my dog,” doesn’t have a clever retort to your email.And yet most of us get online and wonder why it always feels so stale.It’s because YOU’RE making it stale, and you’re accepting stale conversation from others.Just today, I was on the phone with a client who was sharing the same experience with me: “ It wasn’t until she showed me one really GOOD email from a guy that she started to get it. But look at the emails you write back to the boring men.He asked her a silly question and started grilling her with more and more trivia questions, teasing her about what she might win if she got all the questions right. “It made me funny in response to him,” she replied. They’re just as boring as the ones that you received.A great email will never make someone who doesn’t want to date you consider you, but it WILL tip the balance when someone is choosing between a dozen otherwise similar candidates.
Seriously, my friend, this is a very do-able technique and I’ve helped hundreds of guys (and thousands of women) master online communication.Here’s a new article which I wrote as a special to Yahoo! And while I never write emails for others, the request makes perfect sense. ———————————————————— Of all the things that clients (especially men) ask me to help them with, the most common query involves assistance with writing introductory emails.After all, most people’s profiles don’t exactly give you a ton of material to work with, do they? Ask yourself if what you’re writing sounds completely original.So how do you cobble together something from a pile of nothing? If not, the person you’re contacting probably has 10 emails just like yours sitting on the computer screen. Even though you’re writing to someone out of the blue, do so with the belief that this person would be lucky to have you. Your profile ultimately does the selling; your email just has to pique their interest.I also thought you were cute (4) and loved the fact that you go hiking with your brothers every summer. If you want to know anything more about me, just ask. 6) You sound creepy if you don’t warm it up with a signature. You may be shocked how those same people become a lot more interested and interesting when you give them more to work with.This probably sounds incredibly nitpicky, but it’s not. I’ve got two techniques for writing first emails that I describe in Finding the One Online.We all want someone to set the tone and follow along, instead of realizing that we’re always setting the tone ourselves.I realize that I’ve gone on a bit of a tangent from your original question, Dwayne, but this is important.And yet this one guy with the trivia questions was able to bring out your playful side.” The moral of the story is that you are ALWAYS responsible for how you leave a conversation. By being optimistic, playful, interested and interesting, you can almost always transform any evening into a pleasant experience.The problem is that we don’t; we expect the other person to do the heavy lifting – to make the plans, to ask the silly questions, to raise the playing field.